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I've just gotten home from almost 2 weeks of racing. I did the Giro Del Capo, a UCI 2.2 Tour, in stunning Cape Town, followed by the Argus, which is the world's biggest cycling race with over 28,000 participants. Following close behind, was SA National Championships only 2 days after the Argus. What an amazing experience. In more ways than one....
The obvious benefits of riding with such capable athletes (like Team Barloworld, the German National Squad, Belgians, and Polish riders) is that I can step up my game, and learn from the best. But deeper down, you benefit in another way. Friends. People who connect with you, and who are going through the same pain, the same suffering, at the same time. Guys who get broken down to nothing but their core. No more cool sunnies, hot bikes or fancy team cars. The guy next to you is also about to throw up, and feels as if his head will explode in the 45degree heat. Afterwards, you feel a connection and a friendship starts. Something that will endure, no matter what it goes through. Even though this person might live 8km or even 8,000km from me, we're true friends. And it's these true friends that I'm finding are fewer and further between. It's interesting to hear people say to my face "yeah Joey, we believe in you. You CAN do it, and we'll support you all the way", only to find these very same people disappear into thin air when I reach out to make contact. I can only think back to when that very person looked me in the eye and said what they said. What a lie. Why did they bother saying it in the first place? Why did they bother turning up to my farewell when I left Australia to chase my dream? Something they were too scared to ever try themselves - chasing a dream... Why did these people bother giving me their email address to "stay in touch", only to ignore my emails to them... All these people know who they are, and all these people have turned their backs on me. Maybe they're scared of the presence of someone who craves success more than them. It's an interesting thing, this Friendship game. It is a bit of a game, where people try be your 'friend' to merely benefit from you. And when they feel there is no benefit from you, they disappear. But heck, when these 'friends' need something then they know where you are. I wonder what a friendship must go through to become truly a friendship. A real connection. My true friendships with people have been through 180km on a bike in 45degree heat, mountain passes, stomach cramps, throwing up, crashes at 50km/h and agony you can't describe. Agony that is below the skin, where your muscles are beyond cramp, and you can't see anymore. Black spots block your vision, and your heart beats at 185bpm - you can't think, and the road seems to slow you down. You literally ride yourself into a coma for a week. And next to you, a person you've never met, hands you cold water or pushes you. In return, you give him food later on, or let him into a gap and hand him a coke after the stage. You reciprocate. This is what fuels a friendship... As I said before, people disappear when they no longer beneift from you. Ever noticed a 'friend' when you're at a bar?? He benefits from you when you buy him a drink. Ever noticed that he never offers to buy you a drink? He's not a friend, but more a parasite. It gets harder and harder to tell the two apart for me. But my true friends have stuck with me through thick and thin, with no real benefit to them. These people know who they are, and won't react with a guilty conscience by sending me a hurried email or phone call. Because these people do so anyway, without having to be prompted by guilt. These are real friends. Funny though, if I ever end up face to face with my self proclaimed friends, they will act as if I saw them yesterday, and smile in an awkward way with a dragged out "Hiiii....". It's these people who never had those 2 minutes in the month to shoot off an email to say hi, or even reply to my emails (remember, it's called reciprocation). It's also the same people who turned up to my Farewell for no apparent reason, gave me their email address for no apparent reason and told me how much they support me... for no apparent reason. Why do all that if you aren't going to follow through with it? I'd just like to thank my true friends who don't benefit from me in any way, but are there for me all the way. My sponsors, and namely the owners of the companies that sponsor me. it's these very people that help me out for nothing in return, and who truly support me in chasing a dream. Maybe it is because they also chased their dreams to get to where they are now. maybe that is what connects us - a hunger for success. But the connection isn't just 'there'... it takes maintenance, through replying to emails, calls and chats. It goes beyond money and benefits. It is a true friendship that can never be broken down, no matter how many obstacles it faces. In fact, it is this friendship that gets you through the obstacles! So thank you to all my true friends - I appreciate your company and support on my journey through life. Without you, there is no motivation to succeed in what I do. You fuel my training, racing, and you get me over those mountain passes simply by supporting me. You fuel my dreams. My ruthless chase for success. You know who you are.... Thank You. |
