I unfortunately was not awarded the spot with *The Team* (name withheld - gotta play friendly!).  A number of issues prevented the process from taking its’ predetermined course of elimination from a select few riders. Instead a complete outsider was awarded the spot – for what reason I’m not entirely sure. My initial feeling was one of disappointment and doubt as to why I had busted my gut for the past several months, for what was ultimately a mirage of an opportunity. The good thing is that I’m displaying an incredible run of consistency when it comes to these “opportunities”, in that they’ve all fallen flat just when the final step was to be taken. I guess it only reinforces my cautious approach when dealing with people who are in a position of power. But what can I do? I’m merely a marketing product in the fickle sport of cycling. I’m not human. I’m disposable. I don’t deserve a ‘fair go’ and I clearly don’t deserve what I’ve worked for.

 Damn, I’m really just 70kg of raw flesh that grovels and begs others to allow me to market them for little in return. Or at least that’s what the bitter taste in my mouth brings to mind… Disposable really is the word. Well, who’s next in the queue? Any takers on a used product, only 3 owners and willing to do as you command, Master – ready to plug in and go.

To things that are going the way I want! My apartment has worked out really well, with everything finding its’ place in the flat. My flatmate and I are managing to run things fairly smoothly. From cooking to TV show choices, we’ve seemingly got it all under control! I’ve had to become a master of time management as work is obviously a priority, financially. I’m having to get up earlier and get home later than ever before, but I’m making it work. To the ‘cross training’ part – I was invited to have a go at climbing with my Sister, so I gave it a shot and instantly fell in love with the challenge. Needless to say it’s opened up an entirely new social circle away from cycling, which is also nice. The people are much more sincere. And it gives my skinny little cyclists arms a good workout.

Well today is my day off work, so I’m really working the couch, and watching the Olympics. Maybe the wintery aspect of the Games will help cool me off – it’s a stinking 34 degrees here today. Quite refreshing compared to the heat under my collar. If I do find the time between work and play, and get to do some National level racing in this year, I do make one promise. I will entertain, depending on what you call “entertainment”. And I follow through with my promises...